for the past year I have owned a dog that is a Toy Cavoodle. when he was a puppy I started having feeling for it and wanted to do stuff. but I also wanted him to grow up first so he wasn't a child and didn't feel like grooming him. only catch is that due to the terms of conditions of the breeder he was forced to get the snip. I see the snip as animal abuse and had a problem with it. but if he didn't get it then I would be forced to hand him back to the breeder. keep in mind this is my first dog since I was a toddler. all of my experience with animals come from fish that I was not attracted too and had always wanted a dog. We have tried consentual licking where I sit there in my rocking chair as he licks me all over my member but it wasn't satifactory. if anything that was sorta my first physically sexual experience with a another living thing. It didn't feel like anything. but the sight of him licking me down there was really hot. it gave me a sign that there was hope for us. I don't want to anally penetrate him cause not only is my member too thicc but he is around the size of my lower leg. what I really want is to give him the opportunity for him to anally penetrate me since I'm into that. but hes never had a hard on and he has no ability to get an erection. I also live with multiple people and they are already suspicous about me being a zoophile. It makes me feel ashamed but I care so much about my little floofball. I'm just wondering if u guys had any suggestions. or should I wait till I move out on my own before getting a bigger dog.