The big problem on Fetlife, at least in my view, wasn't the volume of unwanted inquiries though that did get old before mail controls were implemented.
It was the guys who not only sent an unwanted inquiry, but wouldn't take no for an answer.
"I'm into (X)"
"No thanks"
"But I'm really into (X) and you should be too."
"Go away please"
"BITCH/CUNT/FAT FUCK I DIDN'T WANT YOU ANYWAY!"
If when I said "No thanks" they went away, it would have been far less of a problem. None of them seemed to understand that no reply at all is actually a reply. It's clearly a no.
The worst were guys seeking a dominant or a mistress. I'm 6'1" barefoot so it's always assumed that's what I must be.
My height was also why I stopped wearing any kind of fetish wear to local kink events. 6'1" in a latex catsuit with 3" heels resulted in an endless stream of wanky men following me around begging for me to beat them in the event's dungeon.
The last few times I went, I wore street clothes - usually a floral sundress with suitable sunhat. Way less pestering.
It amazed me how much my doing that "ruined" their fantasy and they assumed something entirely different I guess.
Which just shows how much some of the patrons of the event really dwell on porn-based stereotypes and fantasies.
If they stopped that, and actually spent 10 minutes getting to know someone, they'd have a significantly different result than what they get - systematic "fuck off asshole" online and off.
I have so many stories lol