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How secretive are you? What does it take to open up?

kartog said:
I've only told one person about my sexuality. She was a LDR that openly talked about liking bestiality in public places. She said later that she was framing it as a joke, but I took it seriously and started talking to her about it. She later told me that she would let her dog go to town on her with its tongue. I didn't judge her and later confessed about my zoophilia with horses and dogs. It was weird because she found it strange that I would actually go the extra mile and have sex with the animals, but she accepted it. I later broke it off with her and she was very angry, but she didn't seem to want revenge on me in any way, luckily. All-in-all it was a pretty liberating experience to be accepted by someone in this intolerable world.

So my question is, what does it take for you to open up to someone? What are your experiences with that?
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For me, it can take a lot depending on what it is. I don't let people in unless I KNOW for sure I can trust them and they show that to me.

With me being a zoo, it will take a much longer time as just someone knowing that info could use it against you at any moment in time. I'd like to make inroads and form relationships and friendships, but not so quick that it jeopardizes myself and anyone around me.
 
Gdawg88 said:
I’ve made some farm jokes at work but that’s about it. Some things are better left unspoken.
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Careful with how often you make those jokes. I've known people who got fired for doing the things they joked about at work and they got caught because of how often they joked about it. Even as a joke it could come off as a weird way to tell on yourself if said too often.

Stay safe
 
horseofcourse99 said:
Careful with how often you make those jokes. I've known people who got fired for doing the things they joked about at work and they got caught because of how often they joked about it. Even as a joke it could come off as a weird way to tell on yourself if said too often.

Stay safe
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We are a diesel shop. We all could get fired for the shit we talk about. Archie Bunker would blush ?
 
kartog said:
I've only told one person about my sexuality. She was a LDR that openly talked about liking bestiality in public places. She said later that she was framing it as a joke, but I took it seriously and started talking to her about it. She later told me that she would let her dog go to town on her with its tongue. I didn't judge her and later confessed about my zoophilia with horses and dogs. It was weird because she found it strange that I would actually go the extra mile and have sex with the animals, but she accepted it. I later broke it off with her and she was very angry, but she didn't seem to want revenge on me in any way, luckily. All-in-all it was a pretty liberating experience to be accepted by someone in this intolerable world.

So my question is, what does it take for you to open up to someone? What are your experiences with that?
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I'm pretty sure my husband would divorce me if he knew.
 
The only way I could see myself tell anyone about my love for animals to someone who has actually seen my face, would be if they had admitted enjoying it too first, with unquestionable proof that they are not just fucking around.
 
I never reveal to anyone my zoo secret. I've only done so with one person who said they were a zoo. I also caught my roommate looking at dog porn and decided not to touch it with a 10 foot stick for his respect. He also caught me with vermillion888's page open on my e621. All in all I'm really secretive and don't really share with anyone unless I know they are.
 
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n0rdzoo said:
The only way I could see myself tell anyone about my love for animals to someone who has actually seen my face, would be if they had admitted enjoying it too first, with unquestionable proof that they are not just fucking around.
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Yeah me too. You’d have to tell me you do it, and tell me in a way I know you are serious. Then I would probably go out on a limb. Might make a buddy to hold the camera while you mount a sheep lol.
 
I would definitely not let anyone know unless I was sure they were comfortable or even into zoo stuff as well. Last thing I want is to tell the wrong person and get into trouble.
 
FunGuyInTheSun said:
In my current state, opening up would destroy my career, my family and my life.
Only discussed it with folks online and met maybe 3 or 4 in real life.
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I find myself in a fairly similar spot. I would never live openly as a zoo. Heck, I'm secluded enough (and perhaps even self hating about it? who knows- that's what therapy is for) that I don't even really comment on here.

That said, I don't think I really recovered after the pandemic- I am far more secluded from everyone than I was back in 2019-2020. The zoo thing has been a part of me for decades, but the seclusion is new. I should probably get that looked at.
 
Vybenz said:
"Ah, there we go," he says as he jumps through he the hoop he fabricated out of my vaguely triggering words.

If I have a bad relationship with one woman, she might be a problem. If I have a bad relationship with all women, so much so that I cease to believe a positive romantic relationship with one is attainable... I look in the mirror and say "Holy shit, where the fuck did I go wrong?"
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yup, the wise right response
 
what I do in my bedroom or my barn room is really no ones concern, saying that and this thread my partner (gay) really loves horses, when we finally live together I want to see just what this infatuation is,,is it mare?, is it stallion? or general and is this infatuation more than just loving horses period, a connection deeper in his head of desire. If I see that door open, I would tell him my experiences for sure.....who knows, it may grow and a small acreage would be a for sure for us. He is very timid, but has come a long long way in being open about men...maybe more
 
dick4me2 said:
what I do in my bedroom or my barn room is really no ones concern, saying that and this thread my partner (gay) really loves horses, when we finally live together I want to see just what this infatuation is,,is it mare?, is it stallion? or general and is this infatuation more than just loving horses period, a connection deeper in his head of desire. If I see that door open, I would tell him my experiences for sure.....who knows, it may grow and a small acreage would be a for sure for us. He is very timid, but has come a long long way in being open about men...maybe more
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I am just going to put out a little recommendation- not knowing either you nor your partner, but seeing a bit of open questioning in your post... (Because this is the internet, and people love to do that.)

Have you or your partner ever considered shrooms? Obviously, use with great care and study beforehand- but I have used them a few times to really dive deep into what is going on in my head, and to great success. (He says... on a zoophile forum before even having a cup of coffee)
 
bonjoe said:
Super secretive. I live with my parents and don’t drive yet so have to be really careful.
It gets super awkward when my golden retriever girl is literally begging for it when other people are around. Lol
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It'll be more than awkward when someone pieces it together. Be safe.
 
Vybenz said:
Wouldn't it be more accurate to say that they are done with you, so to save yourself from further rejection and disappointment, you've decided to tell yourself that you never wanted them anyway?
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That makes so much sense that another rejection Sir. So lonely not to share it Sir.
 
sarahsingletono98 said:
Rum - rum is always the answer to opening up
Wine - wine is always the answer to opening up
when in doubt see - 1 or 2
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We’ve had this conversation in the past…..
I’m my own reason the rum is always gone!
As Red says “Quit your cluckin, it’s the run they be wantin!”
Singing “Yo Ho” the rest of the afternoon
 
EvaMentok said:
See, I made a leap of faith with my wife and told her and I was lucky enough that we have all our values/views aligned.
We never really knew how much our sex life / fantasies aligned until we both opened up and that was only recently.

10+ years married. It's been liberating...
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Very happy for you! Wish that would be the reality for me! Too bad I'll never know because my lips are staying sealed!
 
erphy said:
Very happy for you! Wish that would be the reality for me! Too bad I'll never know because my lips are staying sealed!
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I get this, we were secretive about this and other lifestyles/kinks/fetishes for years.

It was eating me away not being able to share some of my feelings with her, showing her my true colours so to speak.

I had so much to lose though, my amazing wife, kids, house, family friends.
But we always had a deep connection, and I felt it was time to put everything on the table.

I knew we would talk about it at least.
I wasn’t expecting a full blown rejection / get out the house deal. She’s always been considerate and so have I with her.

Turned out we were more alike than we thought, we both agreed that we were already good (couple wise) before opening up.

Now, we’re at a whole new level, we’re at a new high. We’ve re-discovered ourselves.
The things she told me, I never thought she could be into or think about those things.

I was in shock, but I was also so happy and relieved, we embraced all of it together and we’ve started our new chapter super strong.

The risk/stress was immense and we again talk about how I was able to open up.
What is it that pushed me to risk it all.

What helped me was the reading I’ve been doing since the start of the year, mainly topics regarding sex.

How people, generally don’t openly talk about sex, even just the standard stuff and that’s within the couple/partnership.

There’s this social construct that makes talking about sex, taboo, uncomfortable, lewd, awkward etc…

But it’s changing, slowly.
One of the topics I concentrated on, was how to pleasure my partner better.

That meant knowing everything I needed to know about genitalia and then I moved onto other topics related to relationships.

Those were the triggers and in the end, the key element was communication, communication, communication.

And in order to communicate to her fully, I had to tell her everything.

And fortunately for me/us, she responded in kind.

Sorry for the spill.
I also want to reiterate, this was my risk to take, I’m not saying people should take this risk with their SO.
 
I do not share my lifestyle with anyone outside of this site. I cherish my freedom and would like to keep my animals. I would be absolutely devastated to lose any of my animals. Would be a life-ending endeavor as far as I'm concerned. At this point in my life it wouldn't take much to turn a gun on myself, so I will choose to stay a recluse in the interest of not mentally deteriorating anymore.
 
Very.

And not even just with zoo stuff; with everything. I've opened up before to people I thought I could trust and it totally fucking burnt me in the ass, so now I have trust issues.

The only people I've learned that you can trust to keep your shit secret is the people that you're paying to listen to you bitch, moan, and complain about your problems. However, even then, there are still times they have to tell people (the police, namely), so I'm still cautious with how much I tell them.
 
Normally incredibly secretive.

But recently, as time goes on, Im opening up more and Letting clues drop.

A huge step which I thought would never happen, is slowly broaching the interest with my longtime partner slowly over a long period of time,. A few days ago, with a few drinks in us, I was straightforward about it and the conversation went well. He was receptive and after some teasing, turns out mildly curious about it.

Who knows what will come, lol
 
I'm enough of an oddball when I make "normal" comments I get looked at funny. Sharing anything deep has pretty much run off good friends so I try not to do that.

Considering the taboo/legality of zoophilia ain't no way I'm telling anybody I know.
 
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