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Deep quotes you heard or made up?

"I took ballistics in school, fascinating subject things go up, things go down"

I will be surprised if anyone knows where that quote is from
 
"For the first time in 50 years, I find myself in the slough of despond. All about me is darkness. I am praying for light."

-Mahatma Gandhi, last words
 
ShanoirII said:
"We oppose the teaching of Higher Order Thinking Skills (values clarification), critical thinking skills and similar programs that are simply a relabeling of Outcome Based Education (mastery learning) which focus on behavior modification and have the purpose of challenging the student's fixed beliefs and undermining parental authority."

-Texas Board of Education
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That would be funny, if not so terribly sad for the students in Texas.
 
"Basically gods never make mistakes, and so if humanity is a divine creation, then all possible deeds of humankind must fall within divine parameters and therefore be error-free, right? And since humanity is error-free, why should god have to work? Her nine-to-five shift ended when she created people."
 
YIMBY said:
"When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up." - C.S. Lewis
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Oh please, the only fairy tale that piece of shit read was the bible.
 
YIMBY said:
If Jesus really was a warrior lion I might have found church bearable.
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I had to check the back of the wardrobe for secret doors when ever I found a new one, but sadly I've yet to turn up a lion in any of them.
 
Ted Danson Machine said:
This should be on a t-shirt
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The bible called the devil a lion, as well.

And Dante's Divine Comedy, though it is quite obviously non-canonical, and proclaimed by Dante himself to be a total work of fantasy, did have three symbolic animals that represented sin.
A wolf that represented incontinence.
A leopard that represented fraud.
And a lion that represented bestiality.

(Of course, this was written back when 'bestiality' meant 'violence'.)
 
ShanoirII said:
The bible called the devil a lion, as well.

And Dante's Divine Comedy, though it is quite obviously non-canonical, and proclaimed by Dante himself to be a total work of fantasy, did have three symbolic animals that represented sin.
A wolf that represented incontinence.
A leopard that represented fraud.
And a lion that represented bestiality.

(Of course, this was written back when 'bestiality' meant 'violence'.)
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what is this bibble you speak of?
 
Ted Danson Machine said:
what is this bibble you speak of?
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The Inerrant Word of Almighty God, composed of 66 books, one of which almost did not make the cut, the Book of Revelations, because its composers thought it read like the ravings of a mad man, with all the other books given in an order that is certainly confusing and not even close to chronological, even in the same book, such as the Book of Job, and which also references several other books which were never included in the folio, like the Book of Enoch and the Apocalypse of Peter, and are thus forgotten and the original meaning lost.

Also, the King James Version made in 1611 is the only true one by the way. By the way.
 
ShanoirII said:
The Inerrant Word of Almighty God, composed of 66 books, one of which almost did not make the cut, the Book of Revelations, because its composers thought it read like the ravings of a mad man, with all the other books given in an order that is certainly confusing and not even close to chronological, even in the same book, such as the Book of Job, and which also references several other books which were never included in the folio, like the Book of Enoch and the Apocalypse of Peter, and are thus forgotten and the original meaning lost.

Also, the King James Version made in 1611 is the only true one by the way. By the way.
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Oh..not a fan...
lol
 
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