Top things not to say during sex

[K_9River_rat]

I think I'm gonna throw up!

 

[sithislives556]

I wish you had more hair

 

[spinachisgross10]

oh shit, that wasn't supposed to... oh nothing honey

 

[Danbeast]

Keep this up and you might even go down as. 7 in my book

 

[spinachisgross10]

you know the dog is better then you, right?

 

[KnottyMomsRSexy]

Who let the dog out?

Out of the bedroom or out of you?

 

[humananimal]

I have been practicing with the cows, have I improved ?

 

[Danbeast]

My bones! (Nothing inappropriate, just a weird ass thing to say in the middle of sex)

 

[Dobermany]

you know the dog is better then you, right?

Yup that one doesn't go down 2 well tried and tested.
But it is the bitter Truth. The dog is always going to be better ? whoof...?

 

[ZooDonna]

Out of the bedroom or out of you?

Out of the bedroom!

 

[lolquip]

The wrong name (Unless your partner(s) enjoy that).

 

[wishboner]

What's that smell? Did you fart? hehe

 

[coomerfarm]

take your thumb off the tip

 

[CritterFunatic]

"Uh oh..." (without giving explanations)

 

[wishboner]

I have a headache -- have you checked your vagina for radon?

 

[wishboner]

I had this one happen in Las Vegas with a 19-year-old UNLV student!

Are you on birth control? I can't find the condom!

 

[wishboner]

Does this count as a date? lol

 

[wishboner]

Are you planning on staying all night?

 

[wishboner]

While at a hotel...I wish the porno channel didn't cost so much...lol

 

[wishboner]

While preparing to use peanut butter sexually...do you have a dog? hehe

 

[wishboner]

Don't cum inside me! Right as you are cuming inside!

 

[wishboner]

Or right after sex, I get asked to marry them, or they say I love you!

 

[humananimal]

I have been practicing with the cows, have I improved ?

And one more :
my cow is in heat and I got very wet, can you feel that ?

 

[616trv]

Did I tell you my grandma died in this bed?

this happened to me once lmao

 

[coomerfarm]

(singing pushing to the limits in a terrible sylvester stallone rocky voice)

 

[Kristy]

What's that smell? Did you fart? hehe

*facepalms and shakes my head* There's no hope for you...just...no hope. *laughs!*

 

[coomerfarm]

it's time to kick bubblegum and chew ass...(put sunglasses on) and I'm all outta ass

 

[wishboner]

*facepalms and shakes my head* There's no hope for you...just...no hope. *laughs!*

I have said some things I just posted, but not all. Mostly the prego scare ones!

 

[Kristy]

I have said some things I just posted, but not all. Mostly the prego scare ones!

Never a concern for we lesbians, you see. We just fuck to our heart's content.

 

[wishboner]

Never a concern for we lesbians, you see. We just fuck to our heart's content.

All of my scares came early in life, and that's why I decided to get a vasectomy at age 27 because I have always known I was a slut and love variety and didn't want ten fucking kids running around. I have never cheated on anyone, so I'm not that kind of a slut...

My biggest concern is hurting women's feelings because they always fall in love with me, and I'll sacrifice my feelings to avoid hurting them. I have only ever truly loved one person, and that was my first girlfriend.