serill
Tourist
I've been into the idea of zoo sex since I was a young kid(I remember having vivid fantasies in 4th grade about it) and had my first zoo encounter when I was around 12. I struggled with my attraction to it for a while, and right before Covid hit I tried to kick it altogether. Had a good community that I didn't tell my secret to, but I felt being around them helped me try to get over it. Then a death in the group caused by multiple betrayals destroyed my confidence and security I felt there, so I left. During my coping and grieving over my lost friend I turned back to zoo porn and the urges they helped. I got tired of fighting too many things, especially my attraction to animals. I honestly feel like I'm in a better mental health space now than I've ever been. I've made so many positive changes to my life now that I don't need to actively fight against what I feel is my natural sexual attraction. Sorry if this got very heavy, but I just felt it was an appropriate answer to your questionI have a complicated relationship with porn. I enjoy watching it, although I have often used it to avoid my issues and problems. Sometimes though it seems masturbating to it seems fairly benign. I have taken long breaks from it in the past, and I think I'm taking another break to reconnect with myself. Sometimes I have watched it daily or multiple times a day, although I've slowed down quite a lot from that, a far cry from that now generally.
Something I have noticed though is I tend to watch porn when I am feeling disconnected with my partner or myself. I'll start with human porn, and this will graduate (escalate?) to zoo porn after that. I don't think porn is inherently bad or dangerous though, I do want to make that clear.
Does anyone have experiences watching zoo porn in relation to a particular area of life or trigger? For example, stress, or specific life scenarios or situations? (Mine being feeling disconnected and wanting avoid difficult conversation with my intimate human partner)