To my straight hetero Zoos: Is this normal?

Texasmonkeyboy_210 said:
I'm so sick of online drama whores.
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Sounds like you're gonna need a bigger barf-bag...
Texasmonkeyboy_210 said:
Maybe your just jealous that you've always been the one for paying women to have sex with you, and when you hear that a man gets paid by a woman for sex, your tiny dicked monkey brain can't handle it. So you lash out at people on the internet. I guarantee I'll be living rent free in your little brain for the next too months. Wanna prove it? Don't respond to my any of my post, or just just showing everyone that for some reason your feelings aren't hurt. I guarantee your gonna keep going and try to start a flame war in my comments section. So go head. Passive aggressively like the post. Please respond to show everybody what a baby dick you you are. I'm a troll? Yet your feeding a "troll"?

I don't want your drama. If you have an issue more on and fuck off kindly. And don't pm me again.
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Oh, my! It's the mating-call of the desperate wanker that got his BS story called out for the BS that it is! Listen to those dulcet tones of outrage! If you look carefully thorugh the foliage, you may catch a glimpse of this (not very) elusive critter as it hauls its 400 pound bulk through the dark corners of its mother's basement with its cheetohs-orange fingers and matching genitalia, while sucking on a two liter of Mountain Dew! Be careful, though - Prolonged viewing of this magnificent(ly disgusting) species has been known to cause retinal damage, so we strongly suggest you limit your viewing to no more than 10 seconds...
 
Texasmonkeyboy_210 said:
I am a gay male and I run a small massage parlor out of my apartment.

I've only had male clients so far, but last night, things were different. When I went to let in my next client, it was a woman. A female Human. Huh. Getting a paid massage? This was gonna be different I thought.

A bit about me. I'm gay and always have been. Ive never had a girlfriend. So I've never really had sex with a woman. Only dudes.

So after the massage is over, I get kinda nervous, I feel like she's wanting something more. So, while sitting between her legs, my dick kinda brushed past her pussy and it's a bit awkward because we are both naked at this point(I have a special massage bed).

Not knowing what to do, I slowly press my dick into her pussy and she began to tease me, and coax me on.

after we started having sex, I noticed that whenever I pulled out, my penis was covered in a buttery, creamy yellow ish white substance. My dick was coated in it. It felt like lotion but I dont use lotion for massage, I use oil. It didn't smell like anything though.

In the end, after a few mins, I came in her. I came in her pussy and now I'm kinda nervous fellas. What if she gets pregnant? I don't know if she was on birth control or not. I don't want her coming after me or anything and I'm not really ready to be a dad.

so my question is, what was the yellow stuff? Is that normal?
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well at least it didnt smell like shit.
 
Texasmonkeyboy_210 said:
I'm a primal, me and my wife don't really use soap. It's bad for the planet and our bodies
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Where on the south side of sanity did you hear that nonsense? There are hundreds of eco friendly soaps. Wax wood bushes (that grow every fucking where like weeds) as one easy example. Almond oil soap, sunflower oil soap, marigold oil soap, linseed oil soap, olive oil soap … and all of those are made with the pressed oil and wood ash.
 
sarahsingletono98 said:
Where on the south side of sanity did you hear that nonsense? There are hundreds of eco friendly soaps. Wax wood bushes (that grow every fucking where like weeds) as one easy example. Almond oil soap, sunflower oil soap, marigold oil soap, linseed oil soap, olive oil soap … and all of those are made with the pressed oil and wood ash.
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Dunno if they'll be back after that thrashing haha🤣
 
sarahsingletono98 said:
Where on the south side of sanity did you hear that nonsense? There are hundreds of eco friendly soaps. Wax wood bushes (that grow every fucking where like weeds) as one easy example. Almond oil soap, sunflower oil soap, marigold oil soap, linseed oil soap, olive oil soap … and all of those are made with the pressed oil and wood ash.
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And the one that sounds appropriate for THIS nit: Yucca
 
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