Say something without context.

When in the course of Human affairs, it become incumbent to seperate and depart Congenial Union and Cooperation, the universe has given us the words “Fuck You And That Fucking Donkey You Fuck With!”
 
“you need to make you happy. Just do whatever makes you happy. Ill help you however I can. You deserve to be happy. What do YOU want?” “I want to fuck your wife” “You deserve to be miserable“
 
Me: going into work dreading the “Have you met Jesus” question that is her greeting every day.
Me: sees sticker on coworkers car “My kids have four paws”. Says to coworker “I give you credit, congratulations. Really. But I thought you were an evangelical conservative Christian?”
Confused coworker: “I Am, what am I being congratulated on?”
Me: Your Sticker. On your car? It’s just real brave of you to declare to the world like that.”
Confused Coworker: “That I love my dogs?”
Me: “Well, we all love our dogs, I meant the whole bestiality thing. You in Fuckery under your dogs. Begging god for their puppies in orgasm? Claiming them in your freak flag kinda sticker there? Very brave is all I meant.”
Angry Disgusted Coworker: “That’s NOT what that means! That’s disgusting.”
Me: “Yes it does. You saw the news didn’t you? That’s the sticker all those dog fucking people use to identify each other. It was all part of that plan to organize bestiality groups.”
Coworker: Stomps off in tears to her office.
Me: twenty minutes later sees coworker with razor blade scraping sticker off car.
Boss standing drinking coffee watching out window: ”You are an evil bastard, thank you.”
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top