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Rush of getting caught

kerijane said:
My problem is impulse control issues and an addictive personality amplifying the fact that unless risk is real it loses its thrill for me. Like, I have a crippling fear of motherhood but don't use birth control and seem to lose the ability to object when guys don't feel like wearing condoms. I'm also a big baby when it comes to pain but am continually drawn to woman-hating creeps who get off on smacking me around and, say, wrapping their hands around my throat and squeezing. I don't wanna die but I have a massive thing for total helplessness and like not liking the feeling I get when my life is worth so little that people play with it like it's their toy.

Anyways, I've gotten caught. It was brutal and terrifying and totally wrecked my life. I'm self-destructive by nature though, and when the opportunity presents itself I have a hard time resisting the temptation of putting myself in position for it to possibly happen again. I mean, people watching me being bred, seeing just what a dirty little animal I am... Nnnnngh... I know it would probably mean a lot of things for me but even the idea of doing time and being known as that filthy cunt who fucks dogs gives me tingles.
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I'm no shrink but from the bottom of my soul I understand exactly what you're saying

With my basic english I will have difficulty explaining other than in a very superficial way

When you got caught, you probably suffered a post traumatic shock and it is recommended to be followed by a health professional, particularly a psychiatrist or psychotherapist in order to accompany you in the process of care for your post-traumatic stress, but I do understand that you cant go see a psy and say, Hi I've been cauth fucking by dog and I have difficulty accepting it and living it, can you help me

It's very serious a post traumatic shock, I suffered one at work last year and I have not yet returned to work and I am with a shrink

Often we fall into the trap of victimization
The victim reinforces their low self-esteem and insecurity, which is why it is easier for them to carry the signs "I am unhappy" or "no one understands me". So even if she accomplishes something good through her own efforts or if something important and positive happens to her in her life, she will not like it and appreciate it because she is taken in the trap of "I'm a failure and something bad will surely happen later

And I haven't even touched how exciting it is to be to feel wortless and to allow people to see us like this. I unfortunately did not manage to explain it as I would have liked, but I understand exactly what you say and live
 
TammCa said:
no, not at all, I find it VERY erotic
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Thats cute LOL
She's very lucky, she has the opportunity to be introduced quietly not quickly at her own pace, would love to have the opportunity she have
But it's okay of you to respect her choice and not put pressure on her
 
Not really being caught in the act, but a friend saw a load of zoo porn I had saved on my laptop because I forgot it was open and I didn't navigate away fast enough.

I didn't even bother with a frantic explanation, just came clean. He asked me to send him some of it.

Did have to come up with something on the fly the time it was on the screen of my school issued iPad in Physics one time. Less of a thrill, more of a mild panic.
 
Bloodwolf said:
Nope. The results would be dire if I ever get made in the action. Not a place I’d want too be.
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Same!!! I couldn't imagine the embarrassment of being caught, I've almost been caught in the past though and had to lie my way out.
 
knotarguing said:
I'm no shrink but from the bottom of my soul I understand exactly what you're saying

With my basic english I will have difficulty explaining other than in a very superficial way

When you got caught, you probably suffered a post traumatic shock and it is recommended to be followed by a health professional, particularly a psychiatrist or psychotherapist in order to accompany you in the process of care for your post-traumatic stress, but I do understand that you cant go see a psy and say, Hi I've been cauth fucking by dog and I have difficulty accepting it and living it, can you help me

It's very serious a post traumatic shock, I suffered one at work last year and I have not yet returned to work and I am with a shrink

Often we fall into the trap of victimization
The victim reinforces their low self-esteem and insecurity, which is why it is easier for them to carry the signs "I am unhappy" or "no one understands me". So even if she accomplishes something good through her own efforts or if something important and positive happens to her in her life, she will not like it and appreciate it because she is taken in the trap of "I'm a failure and something bad will surely happen later

And I haven't even touched how exciting it is to be to feel wortless and to allow people to see us like this. I unfortunately did not manage to explain it as I would have liked, but I understand exactly what you say and live
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Thank you for your kind and wise words, knotarguing. I'm not smart enough to understand all of your post but you are well spoken and your concern touches me. ❤️

I guess I've never really thought about why I do what I do. I just do it. I'm not unhappy though and know I'm not a victim. I like being different. I like being irrelevant. I like being useful. I like being me. :)

Truth is, I'm healthy. I'm safe. And no matter how low I may feel I know there is always somebody far worse off than I am.
 
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kerijane said:
Thank you for your kind and wise words, knotarguing. I'm not smart enough to understand all of your post but you are well spoken and your concern touches me. ❤️

I guess I've never really thought about why I do what I do. I just do it. I'm not unhappy though and know I'm not a victim. I like being different. I like being irrelevant. I like being useful. I like being me. :)
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I must have explained myself very badly
It's not necessarily about being a victim, but creating opportunities to be one consciously or unconsciously
Anyway its really to thought to explain my self in english, but I always like reading your comment :)
And by the way, you like play dum but we both know you are not one
Have a good day
 
knotarguing said:
It's not necessarily about being a victim, but creating opportunities to be one consciously or unconsciously
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Yeah, I think I have probably put myself in positions for people to take advantage of me, but it didn't start out that way and once the ball got rolling it kind of just became my life. It's a good thing! :)

Anyways, thank you. I really enjoy your posts.
 
kerijane said:
Yeah, I think I have probably put myself in positions for people to take advantage of me, but it didn't start out that way and once the ball got rolling it kind of just became my life. It's a good thing! :)

Anyways, thank you. I really enjoy your posts.
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SEE!!
So you like to be a victim, or rather you like to give others the opportunity to make you feel like a victim, you like to feed on this sexual thirst to be wortless
I'am out of here :p
Love you
 
kerijane said:
Is that a bad thing?

I mean, you'll never find me complaining! :)
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Sometimes this is the $10,000 question I ask myself

'Cause deep inside me I could be exactly like you, sexually I don't have any problem but in everyday life I decided to fight against this thing inside me that makes me sabotage myself sometimes and who like sometime been a victim

Even if I consider that my weakness is my interpersonal relationship, I think I have succeeded in life, but sometimes I wonder if this is really me, or if my true personality is like you, who knows?

The only thing that matters to me is that currently I am an inactive zoo and I hope that one day I can get help or find the courage to do it myself because I know this is my real place :)
 
TammCa said:
My Sister caught me hands and knees fully knotted. I did not even know she there standing in my bedroom doorway until after he had fully finished. eyes and mouth wide open staring at me. thankfully she did not freak out, she was ok with it.
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Omg i just read this!!!you are the baddest liltroublemaker and I want to hang out and know more you fuckin rock!!
 
TammCa said:
My Sister caught me hands and knees fully knotted. I did not even know she there standing in my bedroom doorway until after he had fully finished. eyes and mouth wide open staring at me. thankfully she did not freak out, she was ok with it.
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Im thinking she was interested as well as shocked. I know I would have enjoyed seeing my sister like that if I had one.
 
I had a family member stumble across various especially explicit gay k9 files I was downloading when he unexpectedly sat down at my computer while I was using the bathroom. He was asking me a question, paused, said my name and asked “what is this?” My head started spinning, felt like I was tumbling head over heels. I replied meekly, “what is what?” He started reading the titles very slowly, word for word. I started having an out of body experience and had to hold onto the toilet to keep myself steady. I was like “wait what did you just say,” with a fake bewildered tone. He read them again and I forced out “ew that’s disgusting, I have no f*cking clue. Sounds like we have a virus. I’ll have to scan the whole computer when I’m out.” He didn’t say much after that and I hid in the bathroom for what seemed like an eternity until he finally left. Later on I went downstairs and told him how badly our computer was infected but I took care of it. He just nodded without looking at me and said “I see.” Still panicked and trembling, I went upstairs, locked my door and pulled up the files and proceeded to ejaculate all over myself, one of the most intense orgasms I’ve ever experienced. Whole thing still makes my head reel. ??
 
When I was younger I enjoyed the thrill of playing with myself in public places wondering what someone would do If they caught me...

It was always a turn on knowing that I could get caught.
 
Anja123 said:
When I was young and had sex with our dog, I was really worried about getting caught because a session can take a long time. Fortunately I never had any problems. Now, I'm no longer very worried about getting caught but the idea of people watching me have sex with a dog is a huge turn-on. I'm thinking of organizing a web live session, does anybody have experience with that? I mean, the problem is no setting up a Zoom meeting or so, but how do you invite people, and make sure you don't get the wrong audience?
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Is het je al gelukt ? ?
 
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