What are we doing wrong ?

[Jan Shaw]

Hi Folks. I am a single guy owner in SE Michigan. We (my "boy" and I) were previously on BF and are obviously here. We have been looking for a lady for some little while now to play with my boy and, I feel, but cant be sure we came close a couple of times with some ladies. Usually however the contacts we have made pull out (if that is the right phrase) at the very last minute of a meeting, even after extensive friendly and fun communications, and so cannot be sure if they were even genuine or not. Can anyone provide some insight to how this works in the real world, and how I can be a little more certain than a 50/50 chance someone is real or not. Staying optimistic in Southern Michigan ?‍

 

[GeminiStar]

It might just be nerves, or second-thoughts. People are putting in a lot of risk when taking the plunge to a real-life meeting. Of course there's always a lot of people that are just talk or it's just only a fantasy to them, so actually going ahead with it is beyond them, but it's also just as likely to be the first reasons I listed.

Sorry to hear you've had rough luck though, regardless of the reasons behind it. :/

 

[Renegadewa1]

I've been involved in this lifestyle most of my adult life and I can't even tell you how many times the exact same thing has happened to me.

I've been lucky and have met with a lot of very good and decent people but have also been played a few times as well.

You're not doing anything wrong............................it's just that not everyone is who and what they claim to be.

It happens.

 

[nekdoneco123]

there's a saying "people don't know what they want"
you can see it even here, someone stumbles upon a zoo vid and comes here with "i totally want to do that too" without giving it a serious thought. my guess is "it's taboo" sounds like enough

btw, what makes you pimp out your boy?

 

[Pillar]

I've been involved in this lifestyle most of my adult life and I can't even tell you how many times the exact same thing has happened to me.

I've been lucky and have met with a lot of very good and decent people but have also been played a few times as well.

You're not doing anything wrong............................it's just that not everyone is who and what they claim to be.

It happens.

Then there's people who flake or those who have second thoughts and bail. It's going to happen.

 

[Delilah]

how long do you talk to someone before trying to set up a meet up? I'm so paranoid that i personally wouldn't plan to meet someone before at the very least a year of chat. I had talked to a lot of people on BF that use to try and meet up within a month or sooner and that always made me wary.

 

[Ruben]

how long do you talk to someone before trying to set up a meet up? I'm so paranoid that i personally wouldn't plan to meet someone before at the very least a year of chat. I had talked to a lot of people on BF that use to try and meet up within a month or sooner and that always made me wary.

I've met people after from a few minutes of chat to over a year. The year long wait wasn't due to paranoia though, but because that's when an opportunity arose.

 

[JaDoC]

Been in the same boat as you Here only happened once and on Fet too many times to count. I believe either they have second thoughts Or got scared. But the majority I believe are just flat out lying. Best of luck to you. I’m still searching for a permanent woman myself

 

[surferguy44]

For me, you just have to keep going for it and opening up to people you feel good around. There are plenty of other reasons it might work or not, just cant let it stop you.
Maybe she is fine with zoo, but really hates that youre a vegetarian...lol
or she likes zoo, but find out she's also really into something you don't like
dentistry as a hobby.... ? ?

 

[Jan Shaw]

how long do you talk to someone before trying to set up a meet up? I'm so paranoid that i personally wouldn't plan to meet someone before at the very least a year of chat. I had talked to a lot of people on BF that use to try and meet up within a month or sooner and that always made me wary.

Delilah I would have to say from this side of the question, that waiting that long would lead me to think that this was a fake contact, and probably even a guy behind the communications and not the female my boy would really enjoy being with. A year would be seriously off putting and even lead to questions about the legit of a person.

 

[Octavian]

…probably even a guy behind the communications and not the female my boy would really enjoy being with.

I’ve got terrible news, your dog is probably bisexual.

A year would be seriously off putting and even lead to questions about the legit of a person.

And pushing for a quicker meetup would make any sensible person question whether you might be a cop.

 

[Jan Shaw]

I’ve got terrible news, your dog is probably bisexual.

And pushing for a quicker meetup would make any sensible person question whether you might be a cop.

And this is the type of misinformation that infects our discourse at the moment. A simple back and forth asking a simple question, are you a cop or any part of law enforcement, and if they lie that would deny and court case as entrapment. This type of comment keeps this fun activity in the shadows and is counterproductive.

 

[Octavian]

And this is the type of misinformation that infects our discourse at the moment. A simple back and forth asking a simple question, are you a cop or any part of law enforcement, and if they lie that would deny and court case as entrapment. This type of comment keeps this fun activity in the shadows and is counterproductive.

Not only can law enforce lie about not being a cop during their investigation they almost certainly will lie in order to get the information that they want. It only counts as "entrapment" if they "induce someone to commit a crime that the person would otherwise not commit." If a cop has to persuade you to commit a crime then it's entrapment, if they are simply agreeing to participate in a crime with you and setting up a date to do so it is NOT entrapment. How do you think that they arrest sex offenders? Those officers pretending to be 13 year old girls are not entrapping anybody and those charges most certainly hold up in court.

You're attempting to engage in felonious activities with strangers you met on the internet without understanding even the basics of how law enforcement works, that's dangerous.

 

[caikgoch]

A simple back and forth asking a simple question, are you a cop or any part of law enforcement, and if they lie that would deny and court case as entrapment.

That is serious misinformation. SCOTUS ruled years ago that cops can't initiate anything but they can lie all they want in answer to your questions to the point of telling you that you won't be prosecuted if you confess.

 

[Delilah]

I'm not going to meet up with someone unless i'm 150% sure that it's safe for all involved. If the person i'm talking to doesn't feel the same way then it's just not going to work for me. I'm not going to risk my personal safety or reputation with a stranger who is cavalier about the inherent risks of meeting strangers from the internet, especially people on this site, given the illegal nature of zoo pairings.

meeting with a cop would be terrible, meeting with a sexual/violent predator would be even worse.

end of the day, I like talking to people with the same interests as me but i don't require it.

 

[caikgoch]

meeting with a cop would be terrible

Not necessarily. "Cop" is a job description not a race (contrary to what certain political groups claim). I've spoken with many and you are not in danger from 99% of them. As with the population in general, there are a few with way too much misdirected enthusiasm.

 

[Delilah]

Not necessarily. "Cop" is a job description not a race (contrary to what certain political groups claim). I've spoken with many and you are not in danger from 99% of them. As with the population in general, there are a few with way too much misdirected enthusiasm.

i'm not worried that the cop would hurt me, i'm worried about the legal ramifications. sure, there is no doubt that there are people who are police that are also in the zoo community but i'm not really talking about them. I may not face any jail time but having that kinda attention is just something i'm not keen to deal with. I love my animals and any risk that could take them from me is not worth it.

I am way more scared of crazy internet people than most cops, there's more of them and they don't need to pass psych evals.

 

[Pillar]

I'm not going to meet up with someone unless i'm 150% sure that it's safe for all involved. If the person i'm talking to doesn't feel the same way then it's just not going to work for me. I'm not going to risk my personal safety or reputation with a stranger who is cavalier about the inherent risks of meeting strangers from the internet, especially people on this site, given the illegal nature of zoo pairings.

meeting with a cop would be terrible, meeting with a sexual/violent predator would be even worse.

end of the day, I like talking to people with the same interests as me but i don't require it.

There's a reason that people tell you to trust your gut feeling.

And TBH I would worry more about the predators on here, they tend to be the entitled types. The same types who demand nudes, hogtie animals, etc. You know who they are.