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Telling your significant other

B

Bbabee

Lurker
Hey all. One thing that has never had me fail orgasming was watching beastiality. I have never told any of my partners I’ve been with about this love.
I’ve been with my boyfriend now for over 8 months. He’s into kinkier, rougher sex than I thought. I’m not sure how he would react though. I would love for him to allow me to have sex with our bigger breed dog once we adopt one together. So hot to even think about!!!

Bottom line is- how do I know if I can tell him/trust him with that huge secret??!
 
I've come out to every partner I've had, and honestly, people care about this much less than what you'd think. Most of my partners just went "okay then, want me to participate?" just a normal "huh" kinda reaction like I told them something boring even.
But..! I'm an open person. I don't keep secrets in general and I talk about my interests openly and am not ashamed of myself. I prioritize trust, openness and communication in every relationship! So this must play a part.

Now that's said..
Test the waters by joking! Tell zooey jokes and so on! Show furry art with animal genitalia drawn in them! Try to ask for their opinion on zoophilia, maybe not straight-up but in a way like "This guy got into jail for having sex with a horse, isn't that a bit too much?" etc..
Once you've gauged their interest and opinion, and if it's positive or neutral - go ahead with it!
 
I've never told anyone but I can honestly see it ending badly :( I'm just a negativec person in general but i like to keep stuff like this pretty much under wraps as much as possible
 
HoundDogRuffDog said:
I've come out to every partner I've had, and honestly, people care about this much less than what you'd think. Most of my partners just went "okay then, want me to participate?" just a normal "huh" kinda reaction like I told them something boring even.
But..! I'm an open person. I don't keep secrets in general and I talk about my interests openly and am not ashamed of myself. I prioritize trust, openness and communication in every relationship! So this must play a part.

Now that's said..
Test the waters by joking! Tell zooey jokes and so on! Show furry art with animal genitalia drawn in them! Try to ask for their opinion on zoophilia, maybe not straight-up but in a way like "This guy got into jail for having sex with a horse, isn't that a bit too much?" etc..
Once you've gauged their interest and opinion, and if it's positive or neutral - go ahead with it!
Click to expand...
Like he said, gauge his reaction to anything related to bestiality. The example where he talked about the guy going to jail for being into bestiality is a good one. If it's positive, try being more suggestive. If it's negative, it might be time to be less suggestive. If neutral, then I say trust your guts!
 
I can't exactly help with this because my GF found out about my interest accidentally (i.e. my internet history...). She asked me about it, and it was a pretty awkward discussion to be honest, but mainly I think it was awkward because I was caught off guard and was afraid of how she'd react. Overall, she was pretty accepting about it, but I'm pretty sure she's not interested in participating. This was about a year ago, and it hasn't really come up in conversation (maybe a few times).

For context, we live together in a very committed and loving relationship, so that might have been a factor in how she handled it. If we had only been dating for 5 or 6 months and not living together, then it might have seriously impacted the relationship, but it's hard to say.

It's kind of a double-edged sword. You can wait longer and let your relationship/trust grow stronger (which might help them accept it), but then the risk becomes greater because you've invested more of your emotion/energy and would be a bigger loss if it backfired.

I kind of agree with HoundDogRuffDog, that people today (usually younger ones) might not care as much as you think. The scary part is finding out!
 
Bottom line, if you trust yer partner enough for you to allow him to stick his cock in you.
Then you should be able to tell him anything sexual that's on your mind.
 
I've now told my current GF and former and neither turned out negatively. My former was so into the idea of it she was "practicing' to be mounted with larger toys but we ended things before the experience. My current GF and I have a great relationship and she's well aware of my interests but tends to give me shit for them more than she seems interested.

I'm still waiting on the right time to press my interests and see if we might share a few... We just got our first Bernese Mountain Dog and the thought of her playing with him has me going crazy constantly. Honestly I think it's just a gut feeling kind of thing and if he's a reasonable guy I think he will jump at the idea of expanding sexual horizons. I definitely agree the younger generations are much more open to these types of things and I think that's evident in mainstream porn getting much more kinky.
 
Bigpaws_Bear said:
Bottom line, if you trust yer partner enough for you to allow him to stick his cock in you.
Then you should be able to tell him anything sexual that's on your mind.
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This ^
If you can let them put their weird things in you or on you, you should be comfortable enough to tell them about the other weird things you want in or on you
 
My husband is a horrendously spoiled 9 year old girl in a grown man's body. His reaction to me being a zoo was exactly commensurate with this fact.

The most important thing to remember is that your SO will remain exactly in character. However your SO usually deals with things they do not understand will remain consistent. However your SO usually deals with groups of people they feel entitled to regard as disagreeable will remain consistent.

Think of it this way:

"Gun owners are really redneck slime, and I would have all of them shot with their own dumbass guns."

v.

"I tend to see personal firearms as outdated, although I have family and lifelong friends who disagree with me."

Same basic point-of-view, but the two speakers deal with people they disagree with...or do not understand...very differently.

You know your SO. You know how your SO deals with things. If you have misjudged your SO, then it is better if you know sooner rather than when you have gotten too deep to separate without turning your life upside-down.
 
I cant provide any advice on how to tell your partner but I can share another perspective. Im currently a married man and have been for 5 years, My wife has absolutely no knowledge of this aspect of who I am and honestly its a huge burden and regret. Understand that outside of this I am a happy man and I love my wife very much but I know she would never accept or understand my feelings. I often find myself wishing I could share this aspect of myself with her and know that I never can or I will lose her. My best advice is tell your partner if you can and if not maybe think about how serious you want your relationship to become because trust me when I say you do not want to be stuck in emotional limbo.
 
My boyfriend is incredibly open minded doesnt even care to much if someone likes kids but he despises animal abuse and goes out of his way to make abusers life hell. I dont know if he sees us as abusers and frankly scared to tell him. Dont want to loss him plus he could make my life really inconvenient at work since we work In the same warehouse.

I guess my point being you have to weigh up is telling you s/o worth it? Test the waters sure but just outright is a gamble. Be careful
 
Proceeding with caution is the biggest thing. To just out yourself immediately and say that you’re into sex with dogs is a tough look for most people. However, if you frame the situation as you not really being into at first (like showing him a dog licking a girl out video and then pretending to be weirded out by it) then you distance yourself from the situation. Once you show him a video or tell Him about a story you “heard”, you can gage his reaction and go from there. If it’s good, then confess that’s something you’re into or may be down to try. With my ex I told her how I was masturbating and my dog surprised me one night and licked my cock. She naturally was curious about how that felt and what happened. Eventually during a game of drunk truth or dare I got her to try being licked by my dog. My current gf I have now I felt a deep bond with instantly and I knew I could trust her, so I showed her a couple videos of my ex getting licked out (fully prepared to mock my ex and say how weird she was). Luckily, my gf thought the video and idea of it was really hot so I told her my real life experiences, showed her more videos, and now she is veerrrryy excited to get her pussy licked by dog.
 
SigmatoZeta said:
My husband is a horrendously spoiled 9 year old girl in a grown man's body. His reaction to me being a zoo was exactly commensurate with this fact.

The most important thing to remember is that your SO will remain exactly in character. However your SO usually deals with things they do not understand will remain consistent. However your SO usually deals with groups of people they feel entitled to regard as disagreeable will remain consistent.

Think of it this way:

"Gun owners are really redneck slime, and I would have all of them shot with their own dumbass guns."

v.

"I tend to see personal firearms as outdated, although I have family and lifelong friends who disagree with me."

Same basic point-of-view, but the two speakers deal with people they disagree with...or do not understand...very differently.

You know your SO. You know how your SO deals with things. If you have misjudged your SO, then it is better if you know sooner rather than when you have gotten too deep to separate without turning your life upside-down.
Click to expand...

I have but one question for you Sig,
"didja make him stand in the corner? I would have."
lol
 
Mammal-lover said:
My boyfriend is incredibly open minded doesnt even care to much if someone likes kids but he despises animal abuse and goes out of his way to make abusers life hell. I dont know if he sees us as abusers and frankly scared to tell him. Dont want to loss him plus he could make my life really inconvenient at work since we work In the same warehouse.

I guess my point being you have to weigh up is telling you s/o worth it? Test the waters sure but just outright is a gamble. Be careful
Click to expand...
THAT is why you never dip your pen in company ink. Or have your inked dipped by a company pen
 
Me and my wife have been together for 7 years. Zoo is something I've been into since I was 13 or 14, but I've always hid my interest. My BF account from back in the day was never more than a lurker.

It was only a few weeks ago we breached the topic together. I was nervous as hell. I had teased the topic before, but had never gotten any form of response from the wife if its something she was into.

A couple drinks and a conversation one night turned into other kink interests. Then to taboo topics. It just kinda came out I guess. Turned out not only was she okay with it. She was into it. And proceeded to tell me a MFMF+pony story from her youth. Shes totally into it. Many different aspects of it. I swear it turns her on more than many of our other kinks.

We are now exploring zoo interests together, excited to share our new zoo friendly life ?.
 
Shadow69 said:
THAT is why you never dip your pen in company ink. Or have your inked dipped by a company pen
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Haha I cant help it he is just so charming and cute! And loves books, that's what really drew me in to giving him a shot. What can I say I'm weakk
 
Mammal-lover said:
Haha I cant help it he is just so charming and cute! And loves books, that's what really drew me in to giving him a shot. What can I say I'm weakk
Click to expand...
I don't know you well enough to argue that point, I just know that (from a man's end) those things tend to go horribly wrong anymore, careers end, bad things happen to good people.
 
Shadow69 said:
I don't know you well enough to argue that point, I just know that (from a man's end) those things tend to go horribly wrong anymore, careers end, bad things happen to good people.
Click to expand...
That's true, it helps we work diffrent departments and only see each other during break though most days. So it's not like if things went sour we still have to work together. It's not perfect I know but it is what it is I I suppose
 
Mammal-lover said:
That's true, it helps we work diffrent departments and only see each other during break though most days. So it's not like if things went sour we still have to work together. It's not perfect I know but it is what it is I I suppose
Click to expand...
It is indeed that
 
Bbabee said:
Hey all. One thing that has never had me fail orgasming was watching beastiality. I have never told any of my partners I’ve been with about this love.
I’ve been with my boyfriend now for over 8 months. He’s into kinkier, rougher sex than I thought. I’m not sure how he would react though. I would love for him to allow me to have sex with our bigger breed dog once we adopt one together. So hot to even think about!!!

Bottom line is- how do I know if I can tell him/trust him with that huge secret??!
Click to expand...
I'm not able to help seeing as I've told noone who isnt on this forum about what I do but I feel for you xx
 
so, there are several users who have posted that they subtly worked up to telling their SO and got a positive reaction with eventual acceptance and/or participation. given that, I have a question:

thinking back to when you met your SO, do you believe there were any tiny clues, any subtle behaviors that would indicate that they could be receptive to the idea? back before you got to know then well, in the introductory phase of the relationship?

aside: has anyone actually seen something like the Greek zeta symbol on anyones dating profile (see post in forums about zoo tatoos)? like tiny, in the corner of a picture or something?
 
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I have the same problem. I have no idea and no courage to expose this side of me to my GF. I fear her reaction and what she would do next.
Unfortunately her attitude towards our sex life is very "vanilla", so I guess the chance that she would be into it is quite low.
I keep hoping, but for the time being I will wait in silence.
 
There is a woman at my work that has a few small paw tattoos on her shoulder, but I don't know her well enough to ask her the true meaning of them. I know that she has two cats.
I like to think that she is zoo, but I don't think I will ever clarify that.
 
Bbabee said:
Hey all. One thing that has never had me fail orgasming was watching beastiality. I have never told any of my partners I’ve been with about this love.
I’ve been with my boyfriend now for over 8 months. He’s into kinkier, rougher sex than I thought. I’m not sure how he would react though. I would love for him to allow me to have sex with our bigger breed dog once we adopt one together. So hot to even think about!!!

Bottom line is- how do I know if I can tell him/trust him with that huge secret??!
Click to expand...
Ex and i used to let the pup join in. it was always the best and we both really enjoyed it. Life is a gamble.
 
bsmithdg said:
so, there are several users who have posted that they subtly worked up to telling their SO and got a positive reaction with eventual acceptance and/or participation. given that, I have a question:

thinking back to when you met your SO, do you believe there were any tiny clues, any subtle behaviors that would indicate that they could be receptive to the idea? back before you got to know then well, in the introductory phase of the relationship?

aside: has anyone actually seen something like the Greek zeta symbol on anyones dating profile (see post in forums about zoo tatoos)? like tiny, in the corner of a picture or something?
Click to expand...

I think just the maturity to have conversations about "taboo" topics and her ability to see perspectives of someone being into a certain lifestyle versus someone who isn't was my biggest clue. My GF has never outwardly expressed or shown interest in zoo but she's never batted an eye when zoo is brought up in a movie or when our dog decides to show off.
 
The one thing you don't do is mumble what your saying, say it with conviction and keep it short. If you lack courage it can help to do some physical exercise before confronting your partner with what you want to say. People feel more strong after something they associate with strength.
 
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