Just do what you feel is comfortable. When I first learned of this, didn't feel anything, more excited the girl who told me was excited remembering. Then a chatroom talking to active women giving me more detailed descriptions hooked it as a fantasy and hoping to see, along with videos over the years. Then it became more of a desire when I became single again years ago and was pursuing it, not just hoping to find an a woman, but maybe explore it myself with her too. That craving comes and goes. Seeing a woman has remained, but like you, the wave comes and goes. Not that I can't be teased, but there are times when it's a craving to see or share with her and other times she'd need to entice me and get my mind to thinking of it...whoever "her" will one day be. Never has happened, just some good conversations and the occasional online friend going through her cravings too.
Been with a few women interested, ex was curious to watch videos with me, and had a FWB a few years ago wanting to try and discussed the idea pursuing it for her, but we never got that far. Am talking with someone within the state interested, but conversations have been on life more these last several weeks. But when our cravings build, we know we can tell or tease the other with this topic. and maybe one day it may happen together. But it is fun to talk about a movie, traffic, and how it would be more fun being home and her getting knotted, all in the same conversation without either flinching. It's been less a craving than flirting with the idea now. You've experienced it, so you know the experience. Perhaps this would be a stronger craving for me or for her knowing what you do. For now, it's still the idea of "if I won the lottery, what would I buy?"
So let yourself enjoy, and hopefully you find someone here or elsewhere you can let those cravings free with when they hit, and maybe even more lucky, get to act on them with someone who will comfort you in those moments of guilt.