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Sexual Attraction Issues..

CaptainK9

CaptainK9

Tourist
So, I've been having sexual dreams with a friend for the last 3 Months and know it can never happen (since she's Married and has 2 Kids)
I know it'll never happen and I don't plan to pursue it. Has anybody else had this issue, and if so, how did you dispel it? I'd rather not ruin our friendship by admitting it, but this was the third time.. Also, yes. This is a Human Female.

Maybe it's my Natural Instinct kicking in, getting older and trying to procreate, or another force, but I'm struggling internally with how to feel. Anyone else have this problem? If so, I'm open to suggestions. It's getting harder to contain my feelings. Please help :cry:
 
Spungus said:
I had an affair with my brothers wife, lasted about 3 years, was great times! Maybe you should just go for it, you don’t want to get to 85 and be thinking “what if”
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I've got about 5 years left, but also don't wanna ruin others' lives
 
Spungus said:
I had an affair with my brothers wife, lasted about 3 years, was great times! Maybe you should just go for it, you don’t want to get to 85 and be thinking “what if”
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That's pretty disrespectful towards your own brother, even if you do or do not have a good relationship with him. I couldn't tell you how hurt I'd be if I found out my brother was sleeping with my GF/Fiance/Wife.
 
If you dont want to rock the boat and possibly mess up a good friendship, I would suggest backing off for just a little bit, a couple of weeks. In that time go out and try new things. Find a new female friend, try some new hobbies or get some new experiences in your life.

You might just be feeling more attached to your friend than you should be because you have been neglecting other parts of your life and lessening your contact with her (just for a while) and focusing on other aspects of your life might help resolve this conflict without trying to get her to cheat on her husband.
 
ive had the same thing in the past with a few ""human"" ladies.
only ever acted on one where I was sure we were meant to be and there was a small fling, ended when we'd had our fun :( (after a few months) the time was good but lost a friend of many years which was not worth the sex we had in a short few months.
its pretty natural to have wants needs and very vivid sexual dreams about anyone we spend quality time with but acting on it and potentially wreaking havoc and destroying what she has now is a selfish act and may leave you feeling worse for chasing it for some time.
best to have friends you can talk with then past friends you messed with.
chase beasts not beefs ;)
I now live by the only singles rule (OH and couples where both are in on it) :love:
 
I'm attracted to a plethora of women...and yet none of them like me back.
 
CaptainK9 said:
I've got about 5 years left, but also don't wanna ruin others' lives
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I don't want to sound like a dirtbag, but I say go for it. You've only got five years left so have some romance before you die. I know this woman that I see where I shop at. She is very beautiful and I can tell that she somehow knows that I am attracted to her but I try to hide it. She is married but if her husband is who I think it is then I know that piece shit cheats on her right and left. I have spent my whole life trying to do right by others and it has brought me nothing. There is no such thing as karma. The bad boy gets the girl. The thieves become the businessmen. The pieces of shit become politicians. Then I woke up and realized that I need to look out for myself. Yeah, do the right thing most of the time but remember that you have a right to be happy to. You can only live your life and no one else's. Talk to the woman and see where it goes.
 
DannyWotan said:
I don't want to sound like a dirtbag, but I say go for it. You've only got five years left so have some romance before you die. I know this woman that I see where I shop at. She is very beautiful and I can tell that she somehow knows that I am attracted to her but I try to hide it. She is married but if her husband is who I think it is then I know that piece shit cheats on her right and left. I have spent my whole life trying to do right by others and it has brought me nothing. There is no such thing as karma. The bad boy gets the girl. The thieves become the businessmen and get the gold. The pieces of shit become politicians get the power. Then I woke up and realized that I need to look out for myself. Yeah, do the right thing most of the time but remember that you have a right to be happy to. You can only live your life and no one else's. Talk to the woman and see where it goes.
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I wouldn't think too much about it. Putting the moral decision of infidelity aside, Dreams can be complicated and if "I know it'll never happen" then why risk your friendship. Sometimes sex acts in dreams could also be a symbol of power imbalance and your attempt to regain that power. Like for example having a sex dream about your boss. Ask yourself do you still have these fantasies about her when your awake? Are you attracted to her? Are you in love with her? I'd advise you not to act based on the fact that she's already married and has kids. However if you're hell bent on acting on this then you could bring up having a dream only leave out that she was in the dream. Ask her advice and see what she thinks. If she starts saying that you shouldn't act because the women in the dream is married then i'd back off.
 
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