I doubt I could date a non zoo at this point
- Thread starter DoughyDoe
- Start date
Petgirluk
BANNED
I feel exactly the same way. But I would date a non zoo. I think it's a reality I'm not gonna find anyone to fit the rest of my life as well as my sex life.
SigmaTheZeta
Esteemed Citizen of ZV
Nope. My husband is a non-zoo.
The trick is to come out early, during the "share your darkest, weirdest secrets" talk when it is socially appropriate.
Don't stay in the closet only to spring it on them later.
Tgzoogirl
BANNED
I feel like the more I've learned and accepted of myself the more limited my options seem to be. I can date a non-tabooist but I'd rather date someone that is at least accepting, even if they don't want to participate. Finding a girl that's all into it is the eternal hope of mine.
Ah :-( that just sounds tragic to me. Not being open about myself would def cause problems in a relationship since I hate the fe
That's good advice~ how do you deal with talking about it though? It feels like something where if it's not shared between the two it won't ever be comfortable to mention?
BlackKnight90
Tourist
It's not my post but I have a habit of trying to steer conversations towards taboo interest either by bringing up news articles, random YouTube video recommendations, etc. For example I enjoy watching public debates online and one of those debates was directly about zoophilia. So when the conversation friends/dates goes towards the "taboo" area either by weird relationship stories, bizarre/kinky videos people show you, etc. I can always say "yeah, guess what I saw online the other day...". If anyone gets curious they can bring up my video history and see the hundreds of debates I've watched so it's nothing unusual. While I'm talking about the issue i'm listening to what their saying closely and watching their body language for signs of anger, disgust (which are common where i'm at least), or excitement. When talking about taboo issues its very important (at least to me) to play "devils advocate" since the other person always will say that it's bad/wrong/gross. So it gives you a reason to assume the role of a zoophile openly without any of the blowback. If they're interested or curious about it AND you feel comfortable tell them your interested. If you don't and they start accusing you of being weird or whatever (which has never happened to me) I'd just say you're were "playing" devils advocate.
I must admit I haven't had any success with this model but that's what I do. Then again I have a tendency to hang around do-gooders types so the odds that they'll be interested in this is VERY slim. That's actually why i'm on here.
I appreciate the take but I mean after already introducing it, like if my boyfriend or girlfriend wouldn't be into zoo how would the relationship stand if the topic is brought in conversation? I feel like it's unlikely that it would be treated as just another kink. Sorta asking the original person about what is their life like with a non zoo partner and how it affects them.
SigmaTheZeta
Esteemed Citizen of ZV
It is no more of a source of conflict than different expectations of cleanliness. We have had bigger fights over that. My space looks untidy but is clean, and his space looks tidy but suffers neglect in places you can't see. He cares more about how other people judge him. I care more about sanitation.
You are not always in perfect agreement with your partner about everything. Seeing totally eye-to-eye on zoophilia would be great, but if someone you genuinely love is only willing to agree to disagree, I would not turn them away just over that. That plus being mediocre, maybe, but I have other priorities. If I and my animals are safe, that is enough.
My hard limit on that is if I think someone would endanger my freedom over that disagreement. I can work with quality material if that is not on my list of concerns.
I think that's fair~ for me personally a long term relationship is something where I wanna match well with the person. I'm incredibly passive n avoid arguments because of how I was raised, if I argue with anyone a friend or more and we can't come to an understanding no matter what reasoning is used I sort of don't feel inclined to be around them. I sorta believe if people are important everything can be mediated out.