Mathilde_1997
Lurker
Hello there dear members of Zooville,
I just happened to stumble upon this website today and didn't expected to see such a large underground community to be completely honest.
I think I might need some help/advices, I don't know where to start.
So many, many thoughts swirling in my head right now, I have an immense feeling of shame to type these words, I might as well delete this whole post, I don't know.
Where to start?
Let me do a quick presentation maybe: my name is Mathilde, I am a 22yo medecine student from Paris. I am an extremely shy and socially awkward person in general, I just can't talk in group of people and get nervous really easily.
Anyway, I really feel the need to "empty my bag" as we say in french: ever since I was a little girl I felt impressed when I saw wolves in study books or at the zoo. Animals are so fearsome and impressive to me.
When I was around 16yo I happened to learn about the Greek myths where some women would have sexual intercourse with animals, especially the myth of Pasiphaé (the mother of the Minautor, who had a private moment with a white bull. I found it funny at first, as I had next to zero knowledge about sexuality and all the things related to it, as I grew up in a very strict Christian orphanage)
I was smiling furtively when thinking about it during class or in my bed at the orphanage (I couldnt close an eye for the rest of the night when I happened to think about it).
Later, I started some medicine studies when I just hit eighteen, and as I had a more free access to the internet, I learned about the whole thing called bestiality, I found it crazy (positively crazy, like "wow!", the concept that some women were doing this with all kind of animals in our modern society hit me like a truck).
Then with time, this thought began to come back regularly in my head.
"Womans offering themselves to animals"
Why did I keep thinking of that?
Sometimes I would just live on for a moment but the thought would come back, a week or even a month later.
"Am I a normal girl for thinking about these kind of things?" I said to myself, as I started to grew really concerned.
Of course I never told anyone about this, I can barely talk to people without mumbling or stuttering like an idiot.
My (best and only) friend Emma says I could have all the boys just with a snap of a finger if I wanted to, but I'm too shy to approach people anyway
Yet again, this idea of bestiality came back to me.
Out of pure curiosity, I watched a video or two about women having a sex session with their dog.
I wanted to see what it would simply look like..
That felt... raw. Savage. The dog was shoving his penis into this lady like a demon and I legit couldn't tell if the lady was moaning from pleasure or from pain.
I closed my laptop immediately as blood was rushing to my face like crazy. "Why am I watching this?"
Then I posted a comment on a French forum describing this weird and persistent tought of bestiality coming back in my mind.
I got contacted by a 29yo French woman named Mélodie, who just happened to live south of the capital, just a few hours of train from my universitary residence.
She currently lives in a cottage in a quiet countryside with her four dogs and actually told to me that she was having some sex with them regularly.
We talked and sended each other a lot of emails for some months now, mainly me asking a whole lot of questions about how does she feel about it? Aren't she ashamed of it? How did she discovered it? Ect... Ect...
Long story short: She happened to send me an email this afternoon saying that I was basically unconsciously wanting to have an experience with an animal and saying the contrary to her would just be denying the truth.
Anyway she kindly invited me to spend a whole week to her cottage for the end of the year where she just simply said that she could show me how to have sex with a dog, help me for my first experience and would happily share her "pack" with me.
I would not need to bring anything, as she would take care of everything, she really sounds like a very generous and kind person to me, always calling me "sweetheart" or "princess" and being extremely respectuous about my doubts and my questions.
I sended her a few "selfies" of me (I just took them, standing upfront and smiling faintly as if I was shooting some ID photos, god I'm terrible at taking pictures of me...) but I have no idea what she looks like actually.
My heart is pounding like crazy as I'm writing those lines. What do I do?
I feel both incredibly excited like a little child and absolutely anxious and terrified about this situation, as I have to answer her.
I can feel my abs contracting from the stress. Oh god..
I feel a bit lost at this moment.
In all honesty I feel like bestiality is a terribly bad and immoral thing to do but it is maybe because society told me it is so (I'm sorry, I dont want to offend any of you guys here), and I'm so afraid of what my best friend would think if she even knew of that part of me.
And even if I go to her cottage, will if find to courage to knock on her door? I don't know!
Is having sex with animal dangerous? He may hurt me..
I'm absolutely extremely sensitive, you know... down there.. I very rarely, ahem.. caress myself and had a private moment only once, plus it was with another girl.. so no real "going inside" job you know..
I can barely manage to stick a single finger inside me to place a tampon without putting a hand on my mouth and shaking uncontrollably from the sensations.
Sorry bout this awkward part haha but I feel like I needed to give an idea of my level of sensitiveness about my intimate spot, as I think it might be a real problem for me..
So many thoughts.. My head is spinning as I'm writing these lines. What do I do?
Advices are most appreciated, as I need some so badly right now.
Do I go to her cottage? I can barely manage to talk to people in a face to face conversation, so how she will react to me?
PS: sorry if the whole message is a bit messy and uncoordinated, but I wrote down my toughts as they came and I think it lifted a huge weight that I had on my heart
Best regards,
Mathilde.
Edit: I politely asked her for some pics, as I wasn't sure she was a real woman (as some of Zooville members advised me to do). She said that she totally understood and apologized for not doing so earlier. (She sent some very erotic selfies and even a scan of her ID and her passport, Jesus Christ haha okay I believe her) She look like a gorgeous slender woman with maybe some Hispanic/Latina roots, love it. I suspect she may be the kinky type haha. And thanks for the security advice guys
I just happened to stumble upon this website today and didn't expected to see such a large underground community to be completely honest.
I think I might need some help/advices, I don't know where to start.
So many, many thoughts swirling in my head right now, I have an immense feeling of shame to type these words, I might as well delete this whole post, I don't know.
Where to start?
Let me do a quick presentation maybe: my name is Mathilde, I am a 22yo medecine student from Paris. I am an extremely shy and socially awkward person in general, I just can't talk in group of people and get nervous really easily.
Anyway, I really feel the need to "empty my bag" as we say in french: ever since I was a little girl I felt impressed when I saw wolves in study books or at the zoo. Animals are so fearsome and impressive to me.
When I was around 16yo I happened to learn about the Greek myths where some women would have sexual intercourse with animals, especially the myth of Pasiphaé (the mother of the Minautor, who had a private moment with a white bull. I found it funny at first, as I had next to zero knowledge about sexuality and all the things related to it, as I grew up in a very strict Christian orphanage)
I was smiling furtively when thinking about it during class or in my bed at the orphanage (I couldnt close an eye for the rest of the night when I happened to think about it).
Later, I started some medicine studies when I just hit eighteen, and as I had a more free access to the internet, I learned about the whole thing called bestiality, I found it crazy (positively crazy, like "wow!", the concept that some women were doing this with all kind of animals in our modern society hit me like a truck).
Then with time, this thought began to come back regularly in my head.
"Womans offering themselves to animals"
Why did I keep thinking of that?
Sometimes I would just live on for a moment but the thought would come back, a week or even a month later.
"Am I a normal girl for thinking about these kind of things?" I said to myself, as I started to grew really concerned.
Of course I never told anyone about this, I can barely talk to people without mumbling or stuttering like an idiot.
My (best and only) friend Emma says I could have all the boys just with a snap of a finger if I wanted to, but I'm too shy to approach people anyway
Yet again, this idea of bestiality came back to me.
Out of pure curiosity, I watched a video or two about women having a sex session with their dog.
I wanted to see what it would simply look like..
That felt... raw. Savage. The dog was shoving his penis into this lady like a demon and I legit couldn't tell if the lady was moaning from pleasure or from pain.
I closed my laptop immediately as blood was rushing to my face like crazy. "Why am I watching this?"
Then I posted a comment on a French forum describing this weird and persistent tought of bestiality coming back in my mind.
I got contacted by a 29yo French woman named Mélodie, who just happened to live south of the capital, just a few hours of train from my universitary residence.
She currently lives in a cottage in a quiet countryside with her four dogs and actually told to me that she was having some sex with them regularly.
We talked and sended each other a lot of emails for some months now, mainly me asking a whole lot of questions about how does she feel about it? Aren't she ashamed of it? How did she discovered it? Ect... Ect...
Long story short: She happened to send me an email this afternoon saying that I was basically unconsciously wanting to have an experience with an animal and saying the contrary to her would just be denying the truth.
Anyway she kindly invited me to spend a whole week to her cottage for the end of the year where she just simply said that she could show me how to have sex with a dog, help me for my first experience and would happily share her "pack" with me.
I would not need to bring anything, as she would take care of everything, she really sounds like a very generous and kind person to me, always calling me "sweetheart" or "princess" and being extremely respectuous about my doubts and my questions.
I sended her a few "selfies" of me (I just took them, standing upfront and smiling faintly as if I was shooting some ID photos, god I'm terrible at taking pictures of me...) but I have no idea what she looks like actually.
My heart is pounding like crazy as I'm writing those lines. What do I do?
I feel both incredibly excited like a little child and absolutely anxious and terrified about this situation, as I have to answer her.
I can feel my abs contracting from the stress. Oh god..
I feel a bit lost at this moment.
In all honesty I feel like bestiality is a terribly bad and immoral thing to do but it is maybe because society told me it is so (I'm sorry, I dont want to offend any of you guys here), and I'm so afraid of what my best friend would think if she even knew of that part of me.
And even if I go to her cottage, will if find to courage to knock on her door? I don't know!
Is having sex with animal dangerous? He may hurt me..
I'm absolutely extremely sensitive, you know... down there.. I very rarely, ahem.. caress myself and had a private moment only once, plus it was with another girl.. so no real "going inside" job you know..
I can barely manage to stick a single finger inside me to place a tampon without putting a hand on my mouth and shaking uncontrollably from the sensations.
Sorry bout this awkward part haha but I feel like I needed to give an idea of my level of sensitiveness about my intimate spot, as I think it might be a real problem for me..
So many thoughts.. My head is spinning as I'm writing these lines. What do I do?
Advices are most appreciated, as I need some so badly right now.
Do I go to her cottage? I can barely manage to talk to people in a face to face conversation, so how she will react to me?
PS: sorry if the whole message is a bit messy and uncoordinated, but I wrote down my toughts as they came and I think it lifted a huge weight that I had on my heart
Best regards,
Mathilde.
Edit: I politely asked her for some pics, as I wasn't sure she was a real woman (as some of Zooville members advised me to do). She said that she totally understood and apologized for not doing so earlier. (She sent some very erotic selfies and even a scan of her ID and her passport, Jesus Christ haha okay I believe her) She look like a gorgeous slender woman with maybe some Hispanic/Latina roots, love it. I suspect she may be the kinky type haha. And thanks for the security advice guys
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